Friday, October 20, 2006

Letter 13 Oct 17th- From Rock to bagpipes

Been some weird things on the ferry recently. I was engrossed on a book on the way over to HK last week, sat inside for once as the spray & wind was a bit rough where I / we usually sit on the prow. Anyway, lots of people dump their shopping carts (I even have one now to lug my facepaint kit around on, its hellish) near the door where I was sat, and my foot was nearly touching 1 which had a big plastic bag with a fishtail sticking out of it. Half way accross the thing started flapping around (quite fresh then) making me jump & squeak rather loudly, and eventually flipped/ ripped the bag and escaped onto the floor! No idea what type it was but about as long as my shin. She grabbed t & stuck it back into another bag.
On Friday TWO old ladies were sat trimming their toenails, big chunks pinging everywhere - YUK. One actually had a bit of paper to catch the bits but the other didn't (I'm sure they were having a discreet competition to see who could ping them the furthest). I went outside.
Finally saw the local with the amazing tattoos Pete mentioned - as much of his body as you could see except the front of his face is intricately covered. Looks amazing, actually, like dark blue-black lace - I want a closer look/ pics!
Coming home from the Rockit Festival I was painting at on Sunday, a lady and her friend were sat on the central bench in the ferry surrounded by bags and gifts - think it was her birthday or she'd just been to a party. Again I jumped when the large paper & string Lalique gift bag nearest me started wriggling - then a cat's head slowly rose as if it was a periscope, looked around and sunk back down again. It kept popping its head out the whole way home! It had the oddest ears, almost inside-out, with the tips curled right over backwards.
It spent the whole trip carefully sniffing the edges of its bag and seemed quite used to it - she tipped it out when we all got off and it walked very slowly home with her - either old or ill I think. I have now learnt that animals have to be in a pet carrier on the ferry so that was hers!

Typically my business card printer mucked up and rang me to Thursday to say the cards with my NEW HK mobile wouldn't be ready till Monday, AFTER the big rock festival event I was hoping to hand loads out at - I was not impressed! I gave up getting all my details repeated in Cantonese on the back (what is usually done here) as the office there had no idea what face painting was, apparantly their translations read everything from wall decorator to eyelash painter! I know its a bit rude but to be honest with my lack of Cantonese I'm unlikely to be able to work for a non-english speaking local. However after a lot of hassle & my steep Adobe Illustrator learning curve with over 22 emails/ panicked calls to Jake on all sorts of graphics/ computery probelms, the other printer (who didn't do cards sadly) had my laminated posters ready on Friday and they looked FAB. One is a poster of my company name/ website and a few faces, the other has a lot of photos & names of ideas to help kids choose their face.

New signs for facepainting
Originally uploaded by wildcatfin.

I don't usually have too many photos/ pics for kids to choose from as if I do they ALL want it 'exactly like that one there, and you missed that bit' - I prefer making things up to suit them - but realising the language barrier I thought it best to have faces people could point at. Cousin Lochie - you are on it............ right above my mis-spelling of dinosaur, oops. (No spellcheck/ time in Illustrator!). I wanted a Tshirt done too but can I find it reasonably? In the UK the decent heat-embossed computer-cut ones I wear for corporate gigs cost about £5 each if I supplied the clothes - here the cheapest was around £100 a tshirt!!! I don't think so - too used to dealing with big spendthrift corporations it sounds like! In the end a photo stall did me a printed/ iron on Tshirt which looks good but won't last - I will get the transfer paper myself to do more if I don't find a heat-emboss person, as thats far cheaper.
{Pete & I finally managed to buy a printer at 11pm on Sunday (weird shopping hours here!) but got it home to find it had no USB cable - next trip!}. If nothing else it will be a new playhouse for the tiny ants. They keep crawling out/ over my laptop - Jake assures me the troubles I have had with this NEW laptop are generic & Apple will fix it, but ants are evil - I reckon they are doing the Mrs Frisby/ Rats of NIMH thing and creating their own super-intelligent society, lit by energy syphoned off from my computer inside the case.......

Rockit festival this weekend (15th Oct) was Ok - not brill for cash, but good PR-wise. I had been told to set up by 11, which we did - then sat there until 2.30, bored, when they let the ticket holders in!!!
Made good use of the gorgeous peacock feather fan I bought (£3!!!) as it actually worked as well as matched my wings, and the Fairtrade Tibetan 'fairy' skirt was lovely and cool. Peter came too (though he spent a lot of time wandering the park/ food stalls & went swimming) as the 24 hour sailing race he was maybe going to do looked hopeless - no winds at all - and it rained! Apart from painting dragon tattoos free on most of the local security guards (they taught me a few new words- I can't get the tones right but dragon= "long"), I only painted about 7 kids all day. And had been told I could only charge $30 (£2 - less than in UK). Tho as it was hot AND drizzled (first rain in weeks, typical) most paid for a 2nd face later! High point of the day for Peter was the curling metal 'bangers' at the top of my fairy wings getting hooked into the tangle of electrical wires hanging from the gazebo ceiling. (Nice - all the stalls set up ready for us, with lights too, oooh luxury!).
I was stuck & he just laughed & took photos, grrr. Local adults would come & watch & be amazed (even staff) but too chicken to get done, apart from arm stuff as I mentioned - not used to that, was odd having a big crowd just staring, pointing at my gear & trying to ask what it was etc (technical questions on brushes, glitter and face-paint not covered in my introduction to Cantonese, reckon I can get money back??). Nice to once more get all the praise/ stunned looks from paintees/ watchers - I really don't think there are any good painters in HK as they were all sooo complementary/ keen to get me to do more events etc (even more so here than in the UK, where I knew a lot of decent painters, we were just spread around). Did get a bit concerned about 1 bloke who very carefully photographed all my posters in detail - not like it will do him any good copying them, all have my details on! Also had a TV film crew interviewing bands - we were being broadcast live across 5 Asian cities I think it said - right behind me. OK I had no customers but they had their drinks resting all over my kit, not impressed. Funniest was a woman who approached me with a really odd look on her face - so I returned it & asked if I could help her. Turned out she was a reporter from a magazine (missed the name, darn it) doing an article on 'festival style' and I was definitely the most stylish there. I peed myself laughing and said it wasn't style, it was getting noticed, but as I wasn't in front of my stall she probably thought I was just a nutter. Anyway she took a photo (I posed outrageously) and a list of all my clothing suppliers (not my type of fashion mag at all - she had never HEARD of TEVA sandals, or FairyLove. com wings!!! Disgraceful!). Thing was, apart from a lot of truly hysterical 80's/ the Cure style clone fashion victims, most people were really smart - lots of almost cocktail dresses and gowns! Again, not many of the fun/ alternative people I usually meet. We gave up about 8 pm, didn't bother waiting to see Goldy, and Coolio cancelled - most of the bands we heard were a bit rubbish or loud & grating (bet all the GOOD bands we heard who were practicing as we arrived in the morning were on after we left!). What made me laugh was the lack of notice me dressed & painted as a fairy caused in the late night crowds. The streets are all as bright as day - brighter actually, as the smoggy sun is duller than all the floodlit stores & neons - they REALLY don't look at faces/ pay attention here. A few people, like a guy & his mates coming down stairs as we climbed them, noticed, and were giggling hysterically (crazy gweilos - probably thought its my normal look!), but apart from that only a guy who'd been looking at my website (entertainer/ stilit-walker/ juggler) came up to talk, as he spotted our Tshirts. Websites still working, Jake, cool!


Gee/ Jake - they had a very funky version of the graffitti walls I always seem to be working beside at festivals. In the UK it was usually an old woman who had a moving lorry (that she & her cat lived in) totally covered with blackboard paint, so that you could pay (or free if the festival hired her) to draw/ scribble all over it and she hosed it off before the next gig. Here we watched a team (every single one of them in Converse shoes of course) spend several hours making/ taping up those big brown cardboard boxes from a removal company, in assorted sizes. Then they 'built' them into walls, with arches and nooks and steps, and taped them together. Then they whitewashed it all. The they made lots of intricate stencils to be sprayed through. I thought the public were supposed to join in, and on the second day there were some wee tots painting, but mainly they seemed to get on with their own artwork , in black and neon pink. all the Poscas/ spray smell brought back memories! a couple were good but some were v iffy.
On the other side of me was a local bouncy-castle hire lady, offering the chance for kids to paint little polystyrene wearable masks - cute & fun idea, mum. They drew on or just painted straight away, and she had a few sets of mini chinese opera masks as examples. I had a good look - any pale colours (pink, white, silver) are evil (maybe why all the watching adults were stunned at the girly flowery faces a lot of the expat kids wanted) and all the bold rather scarey/ threatening dark red, green and black faces are the heroes!

The Sunday was better, customer & music-wise. We had left all my gear at Petes incredibly posh RHKYC HQ as it was a 20 minute walk from Victoria Park, so we had a slap-up full english breakfast there first, with the best sausages I have had in years - and baked beans!!!!!- before arriving at the park at 1.30 pm. Much more sense! Anyway, the rest of that day from about 2 - 7 pm I didn't stop, but as I was out of practice/ too hot/ had language problems and the kids CANNOT queue/ choose/ sit remotely still, I made a bit less cash than what I would usually expect at a similar concert in the UK. Loads of adults wanted done too, thank goodness, as not a single grown up was 'brave' enough on Sat! Pete finally got the hang of queue control/ collecting cash after I nearly lost it at 1 wee (ADHD?) chinese kid who spent nearly an hour (before AND after his turn) barging between me & my victims or me & my kit, picking up & touching EVERYTHING after we ALL told him not to, usually just when I wanted to use that paint, etc, - -so was useful & quite enjoyed himself. (Is even now talking of getting me to teach him basic faces/ the temporary stencil tattoos, as he could help more then).
Typically when we stopped the queue for a loo brea k& food they mostly didn't come back but never mind! (The Chinese portaloos were interesting - the first slot-in-the-floor loos since Africa - not much fun in beer sodden festival with many of their lights not working!). We watched a bit of the guy from the Stone Roses (Ian Brown?), who was the last headliner, but he was REALLY badly out of tune! Way worse than Anthony Kiedis usually is. At 8 pm we turned round to leave & realised we were stood in front of Goldy who looks just like he did in James Bond or whatever his last film was. He had no fans/ crowd around him, so I'm not sure whether he was enjoying anonimity or not. Anyway, I have already had 1 booking for a party from people I met/ cards that were taken (double my UK price and she didn't blink - probably as local entertainers charge WAY more than I'd dare), and 2 possible bookings (1 at the HK Rugby 7's next spring!).

After we got all set up at Rockit on Sunday, I kept hearing bagpipes - finally found a massive Brownie/ Scout/ guide parade was going on in another part of the park, with a brilliant scout bagpipe band. All in full red tartan kilt formal gear - poor souls must have been sweltering! Brownies still wear the old brown dresses I loved so much as a kid - don't know what the 'new' UK guides wear, but here its a very bright blue dress with a cute little floppy hat like Mabel Lucy Atwell illustrations. And their leaders wear a lovely aqua green.
The scouts all had those 'It Ain't Half Hot Mum' sort of sharply ironed giant tropical army shorts on. A LOT of the troupes seemed to have a very high percentage of handicapped/ downs children in them, at least in the younger squads, which was noticeably odd. Me all face-painted, in fairy outfit & wings singing along to all the scottish tunes was a bit of a distraction for them (- they even did that 'Knapsack on my back/ Val -da-Ree' one, mum)! As was Peter in matching 'company' T-shirt and bare feet! The other odd noise that sounded like a rusty lumberjack turned out to be coming from all the Phillipinos who had taken over most of the park, especially in the soft-paved kids areas. Usually they spread out papers/ rugs and 100's of them have massive picnics, gossips, and even sell stuff they have made, all day on their Sunday off. But here the kids area had all sorts of 'strength' testers/ aids - like those big resistance spring things you pull on - and it was a bunch of over-zealous granny amahs trying them out we kept hearing!

Despite the rain on Sat its been a lot drier, and the frogs are starting to vanish like the massive spiders. Usually I'd count at least 50 frogs ('boring' colours, look very much like common UK ones) as we climbed up the stairs, either hopping out from under our feet or struggling up the path sides (they fall down a lot), but now 10 is lucky. Sadly the brief cool patch hasn't lasted and its STILL mostly over 30 degrees and humid, so still have AC on. The nice quiet AC in the sitting room has bust - smells mouldy and tho it blows air when on, it doesn't cool anymore, as well as dripping all over the sofa,- oh dear. I spotted posters warning they can prosecute you if you don't maintain your AC is it can spread dieaes & mosquitos so we will try to find one of the landlords englih speaking rellies to tell him.

What made me laugh the most last week was when I found Marks & Spencers in Central. I was trying to find nice flat shoes (no joy - they did have my size but again only in pointy high stilettos!!!), dripping with sweat in a summer top & skirt. All the locals were trying on matching fur or knitted scarves, gloves & hats - and walking out wearing them!!! All the shops have jumpers on sale now, even knitted santa & reindeer hideous christmas style ones! On a nice note, M & S had really beautiful colourful stuff, including a skirt made out of what looks like the same fabric as my favourite pair of Guatemalan trousers (the green/teal stripey ones I wore until Uni when Jake nicked them). AND the only size left was a 10, which I fitted - OMG think they had the labels wrong is about 3 sizes smaller than my usual! AND on sale - justified purchase I think!

Halloween is MASSIVE here, loads of parties etc (hoping I get some bookings!), and the huge 'Ocean Park' (almost an entire island devoted to rollercoaster rides and live pandas) transforms into a spooky place with 100's of ghoulish actors leaping out. Their adverts are hysterical, as they talk about how it will be an even scarier, eerier bash than last year - but the blurbs say 'kids we promise an even more erotic experience than last year!'. Ooops. I LOVE all the lanterns etc for sale, and again, so cheap - have sent some of you the tiny mini round paper ones that are decorated to look like cats or spooky scenes. If anyone wants Halloween/ fancy dress stuff, come & visit/ get me to post them - too cute!


Oooh houses..... did I say we went to look at a 'pleasure junk' we though we might buy to live on? I was surprised, as given my hatred of most on-water-things, I didn't think it would appeal, but living on a mooring in the fairly quiet bay between Petes work island & the mainland would do. I could swim the channel in 5 mins, and as we would have no proper loo/electricity we could shower at his club etc. (Can't quite do all the stuff we planned for our eco house but at least could use solar panels, wind & that solar shower we got given at our handfasting). This boat was VERY nice, actually, not as I expected (think more Henley cruiser than chinese pirates); 40 ft long, all dark varnished wood & brass.
Massive rooved open-sided back area, with bench seats surrounding a huge table, and ladder to a little diving/ ladder shelf bit at the back. Steps down to a largeish cabin with tiny kitchen & seating area, mini loo. Cabin in the prow with 2 wedge -shaped beds Pete could just fit in diagonally. Walkway at the back seating level right round the boat, with sunbathing above the main cabin & further wooden seated/ sun area above the back higher up on that roof. Older than me but well maintained by a group of businessmen who used it to take their kids out. We decided not to as it was fairly pricey and nice but not ideal use of space - and its not a sailing boat which is what P wants. Petes now found a catamaran in the Phillipines he likes, smaller accomodation in the 2 hulls, and we could put a gazebo up on the deck as it has no cabin there. Then we found the website of the original owners who it was built for, saying when they retired & sold it they found it had some wood-boring beetle problem - that the current vendor doesn't mention & has still added two 0's onto the end of the price he got it from them at! Still, good bargaining chip as I expect we weren't meant to know about that! We are both fed up of life being dictated by the ferry times, especially as the last one home is before 11 so we can never stay out late - yes we can get a junk but they are slow, far more expensive and again often gone at late hours! Plus sadly the lack of roof shade/ shelter means the house heats up beautifully, with the brown-tiled floor to the roof, and then roasts us all night. Will be handy when it gets 'cold' I suppose but is a pain now.
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Thursday, October 19, 2006

Letter 12 - Autumn Moon Lantern Fest

I don't know what our kitchen gecko has been up to, lots of purring/ croaky sort of challenges at night, that were being answered from the stairs up to our flat. And when you open the fridge door he makes wee burbly noises that sound like bubbles. Anyway there is now a new gecko, a tiny one about an inch long, very cute, bit like a tadpole as you hardly see its legs; seeing it a lot but not seeing the bigger one anymore - not a David & Goliath event I'm sure so not exactly clear how the titch beat/ was allowed in by the big bloke! I had hoped it was what had cleared up the 4 mozzies I killed beside the bed last night but Pete reckons its a spider as he's found a web in a corner nearby. Ick.


Tuesday I went to Macau to cancel my tourist visa - I had planned to stay the day but I got put in the very front row of the massive catamaran ferry where there were no windows (but loads of legroom) and by the time I got there I felt so ill, that after taking 40 minutes to clear customs I sat in the loos for half an hour and got the next ferry back to Hong Kong!
Still, as it meant I left the country (Macau is part of mainland China), when I came back through passport control they activated my dependency visa so I can now apply for that ID card & stay here longer than a tourist could. Woohoo, nearly official! I had the wierdest breakfast - what I thought was a real croissant - but the middle was filled with fluffy pinkish brown stuff that was sort of sweet then tasted meaty. I later spotted a packet of it in the supermarket so we got it - 'Flossed Pork'. It looks like the contents of a loft insualtors' hoover bag - it really is dust/ fibres of pork, with a sort of sickly sweet sauce it was cooked in, I guess - but it goes back to feeling/ tasting meaty as you eat it! Odd.


On the ferry they had a truly awful 'Gong Show' type of talent competition on the TV - public came on, often with very clever/ pro-looking costumes & ingenious props, to perform little skits, dances, etc. If the audience liked them a big sort of clapometer scale lit up, if it reached past a certain level they were 'winners' and went mad with joy as bunny girls gave them medals. No-one failed in the 2 hours I was there! But it was really 'old fashioned' by our standards - lots of stuff with people in all black costumes 'hidden' against a black background moving coloured puppets/ helping visible people do amazing stunts; small children singing (badly? I can't judge Chinese style) with simple actions; kids on stilts in costumes etc. Anyone under the age of 10 won by just being there I think; aside from that they loved when people did things on their heads so it was their feet/ backside being seen. Its the same with a lot of the Tv adverts, they seem SO naive & simplistic - like early TV adverts in the USA/ UK - you know, the perfect family with fixed smiles, simple, stilted, cheesey lines to say & lots of stroking the product being advertised whilst holding it against their cheeks, yik! The most-run ads at the moment are for a tutoring school, where all the school kids are running into a bakery to buy 'A' shaped bread, or onto a bus to hold 'A' shaped handles with the tutors. The other which I really don't get, is a posh lady in a beautiful house, remembering things from photos on her mantlepiece - her being podgy and doing a strange sort of 'birdy song' keep fit class, then being skinny & wandering around her amazing pool & grounds in beautiful designer dresses & doing more odd Spice Girl dance routines on the lawn. There have been ads for other weight loss/ get popular dance/ fitness classes - sorry, if you did what they seem to like here in the west you'd be laughed out the door by anyone over 6! I don't even know how it works - doing a few gentle John Travolta type points & hip swings surely isn't effective exercise??? But this ad - is if for weight-loss, dress designers, posh hotels or what???

Butterfly cakes for Moon Fest
Originally uploaded by wildcatfin.


I found the Hong Kong western market as I left the port, and spent more than I should have on amazing fabrics in the hope I can find a tailor to make me a new fairy dress to work in - BEAUTIFUL silks there, not just the more usual brocades with traditional patterns, but 2-tone with wired embroideries etc; sparkles, beaded. spangles..and the price is still half of what the chinese Arts & crafts centre had it at even though the market was in a pricey bit of town! Still, some of the silks were about £3 a metre, I think - thats what rubbish cloth costs in the uk! There were lots of rather rude Indian ladies buying sari materials too. The stall owners all really try to push the latest designer fabrics at you but I had no interest in rolls of Calvin Klein/ Chanel etc - expect its handy if you want rip-off copies made though!

Does anyone know if sulphur does actually drive away snakes? I keep seeing it everywhere so I asked what it was - just big streaks/ lumps of bright yellow, under boardwalks, around plants etc. I came out of the flats stairwell yesterday to catch the boat and a local said, 'stop, snake, over there!!!!!!" (pointing about 4 houses away in the opposite direction). I said, oh cool, can I see it? And he stomped off in a huff....... Pete apparantly did the same to one of the ex-pats he often walks back up the hill with, who constantly nags him about not wearing shoes. The guy was so happy to have finally SEEN a snake when he was with the shoe-less Peter - but as it scarpered as soon as they were in sight Peter sort of won the arguement I think.

I have been keeping busy writing (not paid! - but fun) for one of the big Face Paint trainers/ supply shops- the London School of Face Paint & their international supply shop. Bibi the owner freaks me out a bit as I think I will turn out JUST like her, (I hope so anyway shes lovely& her work is fab) and that was before she told me that all the stuff I do now (wings, jewellery and obviously art/ face paint) she did years back!!! Anyway, we talk a fair bit on email & she was sending me some stuff I ordered, and said would I write a bit for their online magazine; so I did & think she liked it - all about alternative Halloween/ afterlife beliefs & practices in different cultures. Will be published on her site soon anyway & has said would I do more. It was quite interesting actually - I knew the Celtic, Mexican & Chinese stuff but the few examples of African (Ananse the spider god) & Aboriginal (the octupus-tentacled man monster who eats people whole then sicks them up as shorter versions of themselves) etc I researched were cool! The idea was to give inspiration to painters fed up of vampires & pumpkin faces. She wants me to do more, which I will. Slightly addicted to the internet (which keeps cutting out) at the moment, but being out of contact (as my phone ran out & I'm not allowed to buy an HK contract until I have my ID card) winds me up.

Chinese lanterns Aberdeen
Originally uploaded by wildcatfin.



On the subject of magazines, the Industry mag that asked me to do a step-by-step face for them (and liked the ones I did on Vicky & my wee cousin Stephie) wrote to say they wouldn't be using my pics in the launch issue after all. Then they saw the 2 pics I sent you lot (the green monster cat & tiger-licking-arm) on my website and offered me an entire article/ page on me instead in the second issue! Yeeks! Won't be till spring I think, as they only publish 3 times a year. Annoying as I still can't use/ enter comps with the faces I did for them until they have published them first, and have to do them more now. Still, they are posting me an early copy of their launch mag so Petes sis can bring it with her in October, when they don't actually 'launch' properly until the International UK Convention in November.

I spent the afternoon at Petes work - I still don't understand HOW he eats his 2 portions of lunch on his own - I only managed half a sandwich and a few forks of the noodles, and I can EAT!!! He says his portions seem to get bigger weekly too. I tried to find suppliers etc (unsuccessfully) on the internet while he worked - and I had a proper shower, LUSH!!!
As we walked along the shore in the dark to get the bus, lots of families and parties were set up on the beach, with BBQ's and picnics. All the kids had home- or school-made lanterns, and everyone was covered in those little glow-in-the-dark flexible snap-stick tubes that you can twist into shapes or just wear as bracelets. With all the candles and glow sticks it really looked magical. Anyway I persuaded Pete to go into Central as the big lantern lampshade things I spotted being built last week got launched last night, were on tonight (Friday) and finished on Bank Holiday Saturday, so I thought it was best to see them tonight as possibly it would be slightly quieter. (Every club, cafe and organisation was having its Autumn Moon Dinner tonight - even Petes centre was going mad as the head chef stressesd out about having 100 bookings already!). The crowds in Central were SCARY, luckily our tram by-passed them all & dropped us in front of the main library by the park entrance.
The wierd structures I spotted last week being built were a 'Lantern Wonderland', with amazing clear plastic pebbled/ bubbled pavements surrounding them that had blue, green & white fairy lights flickering through it (I actually preferred that to the structures!). Allegedly it was a 'fusion of modern & traditional culture on a water theme' (I got caught to do a survey for the tourist board but got my own back by not having a job that fitted into any of her categories and really confused her - and not knowing what my annual household income was in US dollars!). The massive lantern things had mechanical bits inside them that raised or lowered the sort of volcano-shaped wire & fabric structures, and lights, music, drums, smoke, and odd coloured shapes were projected onto & out of them. The rest of the place was decorated with traditional fan & lantern lights, with some HUGE lanterns which looked more like immense fairground rides - but were really intricate multi-colored statues almost, lit from within.
Whoever was selling the kids plastic blow-up cartoon character lanterns that sang annoying songs should have been shot though - and they looked so tacky against the others! All of them were carried on little mini fishing rods, the plastic rods had batteries in the handles to light the lantern or make it move/ sing. Pete went totally drippy over all the wee kids in their chinese dresses - cute! The full Moon was amazing.

We then headed for a region behind the library where a fire dragon dances all around the streets from the Lin Fa Kung temple. It started 175 years ago, when a village plague was stopped after an elder dreamt that Buddha told him to light fire crackers and do the fire dragon dance - they think it was the sulphur in the crackers that helped too! it was SO crowded even Peter could only see the tops of the drummers flags, so we went wandering around the whole dance route to try and find food or a spot to watch. Luckily I found a tiny ally which ended on the blocked off street where they were actually preparing the dragon! We were stood at about the front 3rd of the body/ tail. It's body was a long sinuous rope-like wired piece of fine brushwood, about the thickness of my arm; like when you twist and wire brush as a base for Christmas wreaths - like heather branches. Except this went as far as I could see in each direction - 67 metres long!!!! Every meter the 'rope' was wired onto a thick numbered pole that rested on the ground and was held by a 'dancer'. The head was an ornate outline of the traditional chinese dragon, with the big eyebrows etc, again in brush, but attached to the body by a long proper rope so it could be more flexible. As we watched, runners from surrounding streets were bringing sheaves of thick incense sticks (as long as to my elbow) from fires where they had lit them, to some more of the dance team who were frantically stabbing handfulls of them into the brushwood structure. There were also several poles with massive balls of joss sticks which were independent like the pom-pom bits those dragons have. Anyway, eventually (they were late starting) they had enough sticks bristling out of the dragon, and picked up the whole thing & shook it to get rid of as many loose sticks as possible. The police & even us behind the street barriers got showered with sparks & glowing joss sticks!
They gave a huge cheer as the drummers reached the front of the dragon, and off they went! It looked like there was a lot of inertia or it was hard to control the body, as while the head cavorted off in very life-like fashion, the tail was listing & veering from side to side of the street and started a few shop awnings smouldering! The dancers all had matching Tshirts but ranged from kids and young women to old men, so I hope they had lots of rests and swapped - it was blazing heat from where we stood, so being directly under 1000's of joss sticks must have been BOILING!!! As well as the sparks/ smoke - a more valid reason for wearing the face masks they love so much, I would have thought! Some had towels & sunglasses on but really only a few. Still, it was a fab atmosphere and looked great, just a pity we had no chance to see it from the front - but we headed off to get our last ferry & avoid the mass exodus. I'll try to add my iffy video of it to this email - was only taken on my camera, in very crowded conditions, so not brilliant but gives the idea! the bit where i go 'whoo' and there are sparks is where it hit the awning above me.


Waiting for the minibus home we were drooling over the tiny puppies in the pet shop district again. You are not allowed to take photos otherwise I could show you the odd shaved faces on the wee terrier dogs. Finally saw a 'normal' faced cat - most in the shops have the horrible squashed noses like pugs/ those oriental cat breeds, (although the ones on our island are normal) but this was a gorgeous maine coon cat. I always remember the one the medical research student had in Belize when i was doing my thesis on Mayan herbs - it would hang out the jeep window like a dog & go bounding off into the jungle wherever we stopped, turning up to check out where we were every hour or so, even crossing rivers with us.......... Don't know if its normal or for the festival but we kept seeing pets being carried around last night, with 'outfits' (oh dear) or at the very least Elton John style star-shaped sunglasses! True fashion victims as its dark after 6 pm now!
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Letter 11 -Decorations & China Day Big Bang

Thursday night my mobile went, and I swear I thought it was cousin John Crawford Jnr - you know his habit of ringing unexpectedly and trying to fool you? There was me going 'stop it Johnny, you daft tart, I know its you' and this other guy insisting he wasn't! Spitting voice of him though. Anyway he's a top entertainer/ runs one of the best events companies (I checked, the others on the ferry were impressed - from converting the yacht club to a life-size Camelot for a 12 hour ball, to taking top workers on camping trips in the Masai Mara!) and want me to do full body paintings. I said I'd be willing to try, not something I've ever done - seen a lot of living statues (one idea he likes) at the Nat Hist Musuem's corporate nights, but I'm a bit scared of doing a whole one alone - more usually see a couple of people painting 1 person, so it takes fewer hours! First possible booking for me would be with the Mandarin Oriental's platinum flagship Hotel (have seen the ads on the other branch which reopens this week after an extensive revamp - all presidents/ top hollywod stars etc!!!) ooer, wants something different every week for their ladies nights . (ALL the clubs/ bars have ladies only nights, not sure why - women are respected as people who can run businesses etc and it feels very safe here). Lots of rich 'Taii-Taais' (means 'Mrs' but in this case means extremely wealthy pleasure-seeking/ bored ladies who don't have to work)! He also seemed to be fishing as to whether I'd like to take over his kids 'Magic Circus' party business so he can concentrate on the events.......hmmm, interesting. And he wants to start an educational fun show to take round schools too, about anything as long as its in simple english to help them learn to speak it - right up my ally! Best is his main office/ costume wherehouse is 5 minutes walk from our ferry! So waiting to hear more from him.


Funky big moth on Lamma
Originally uploaded by wildcatfin.


What else. Played with a cool moth bigger than my hand yesterday, think it was hiding under the wheelie bins when the quad-bike bin guy came to empty them at midday, so it was a bit confused. Later I was waiting to cross the sreet at a corner in Central when the contents of a fish box beside me really threw me - looked like someone had speyed several male elephants and stored the bits in a big water filled glass tank. I THINK it was some sort of giant clam, held shut by an elastic band, but not the rippled shell type: more like huge versions of the ones you find on UK beaches that make tiny butterflies in cheesey shell-art pictures. Still alive, with the foot of the snail stretching out longer than my arm. umm, not fancying that! Also started seeing a new (to me) species of crab in the stalls, not the bright stripey one, but a biggish one who's shell looks as if it has two eyes painted on it.


Kids again - I have seen a lot more, but only one pram/ trolley - they ALL get carried! Ok, some new mums have slings but compared to home/ USA hardly anyone - different conceptions of safety? I can understand the no push-chair thing, with the crowds, all the stairs and escalators it would be a nightmare, but surely knocks & bumps whilst carrying a kid could have worse consequences? You never see a parent/ Amah alone with a kid either, always at least 2 adults. Did I say it seems if you want to adopt here you have to get a maid/ nanny to pass the checks???? All the toddlers were dressed up on Friday - I think next week China shuts down for the Moon festival so maybe they are doing it in school. All the little boys had pale yellow silk chinese suits, all the girls were in awful OTT princessy dresses. Cute though!


They have started decorating the streets for the festival, lots of rabbit/ goldfish/ dirigable (horizontal physalis flower ie chinese lantern plant shape) lanterns, dripping gold with red fringes, all in lime gree, pink & orange. Some are decorated like Mexican pinatas with the layers of tissue fringe which threw me a bit. Victoria Park in Central (opposite the library) had massive stages going up, along with huge wierd multicoloured 'lampshade' structures...? In the photos I took Queen Vic's statue looks like she's licking an ice-crea (her sceptre!). I have even now seen 'Garfield' moon cakes - they do them in all sorts of weird colours, with different cartoons moulded on the top instead of the pretty traditional flowers & patterns. I stuck up a few pics of cheaper moon cakes (not allowed to photo the posh ones in the supermarket) and butterfly cakes from our wee bakery. Got excited about what looked like crispy baked cheese bread rols - disappointed again - smelt beautifully of cheese but was once more a ball of gooey chewy sweet bread with sweet read bean bits & not the slightest cheesey flavour.

Posting isn't too bad, I finally found the post office - its all green & purple which is why I missed it - would be easy if I'd been colourblind! Odd to see locals post - stamps in same corner as us, but 1 short vertical string of symbols below it is the address! Again they seem to use double the staff to what they need- 1 guy was reading out where the letters I had were to go, the other guy told him how much I had to pay for each, which the 1st guy scribbled on the envelopes, and a 3rd guy beside them ripped off the correct stamps for me to stick on. Oh yeah and someone else gave me little customs stickers to fill out & stick on, but the 1st guy took the money & gave me airmail stickers!!!!!!!


Have I said how LOUD locals are? The events guy said it was the way they learnt in school - from a few TV ads I have seen of kindergartens, I think they just shout out answers so lord knows what their classes sound like! Anyway the hordes that descend on us at the weekend climb up the steps & take the path past our flats to do the ridge walk/ go to that beach Pete took me too. Even when theres only 4 of them its like a whole gaggle of geese, they really do gabble away as if they are in the middle of a loud disco. The dog accross the path worries/annoys me too as every time someone passes he 'barks' like a duck with a cough!

Sunday was Petes only day off, and was dull & grey, but as the wind was meant to drop after lunch we piled onto an early ferry and got the minibus all the way past his usual stop to Stanley, in the south of the main Hong Kong island. I was going to come anyway as I'd hardly seen Pete all week, but he then announced we could go househunting (mainly to prove we can't afford to live there I think) which added interest. I had my nice camera with me which disgusted Pete as the driver then thought we were tourists and kept trying to make us get off where there were shops etc! But me being privaledged I got dumped at a grotty little beach HEAVING with windsurfers.
I think even Pete was a bit surprised, as he's been there every day for the last few weeks and never seen it like that - but its a bank holiday weekend! He hauled his board etc out from behind the metal lock-up (not tied down/ locked up or anything - how long it will not be nicked I have no idea) which is the w-surfer's 'rentals & shop' & got set up to go out. Chaos - kids on lessons, adults struggling to teach themselves, assorted posers; a few classes learning to kayak/ canoe, lots of boats moored with really long ropes all the way back to the beach, big rocks, some sort of really fast timed windsurf races going on further out........ all the frenetic activity as I think HK's ONLY gold medal is in windsurfing so its a bit popular. I hadn't known we'd be doing this - no english magazines in the local shops & no book with me so I mainly got in the way of people rigging up their gear (the beach was THAT crowded - nowhere to sit) and photographed funky bright dead crab claws. Whee.

Funky crab claw, Stanley Beach
Originally uploaded by wildcatfin.

At least Petes new board was an unusual & wierd mint green so I could occasionally spot him in the haze. So no looking at flats then - and the few ex-pats around were not smiling/talking so I didn't ask!

When Pete finished we went all the way to the north of the island to get a huge posh catamaran ferry to another island, Lantau. It's about the same size as HK island, lying to the west of it, and has HK International Airport on the North of it. (We tried 'rice rolls' for lunch, yug, the rice was made into slimey sheets like thick lasagne, rolled, and dipped in an odd scarlet sauce that dripped everywhere as you tried to eat it with a massive toothpick.) Allegedly it look likes the Scottish highlands.... well, maybe if you squint a bit - lots of twisting roads up & down deep valleys & high hills. But I don't remember human- sized leaves, massive cheese plants, and enermous water buffalo (still like identicle to Cape Buffalo to me) on scottish mountains! Looked like lots of walks, mountain bike trails & country parks, but we of course went to the other side of the island to a windsurf beach. A guy there has the board Pete is thinking of buying from someone in the UK (as they aren't made any more) and said Pete could try it - as he'd just popped his shoulder, an extremely enthusiastic teenage neighbour of his had bought the board down. This kid was overjoyed when he realised Pete taught him sailing every Thursday! So Pete went off - very slowly as there was no wind - and I sat on the beach again. Far nicer - first non-coarse sand I'd seen, and quite clean, but the sand was a sort of blackish brown, hoping that was due to rock type & not pollution! Seems a very friendly area, loads of ex-pats with kids, massive sandy area and shallow water for miles unlike the other beaches we have seen; and a nice windsurf centre/ cafe! But again, way too pricey & is a longer ferry ride with a bus trip at either end for Pete to get to work. On an even better note, the stalls beside the catamaran ferry terminal sold short in ex-pat sizes! Well, for blokes anyway. We look a bit daft as we got the same pair of baordies in different colours - I know I can fit Petes so we got the same size - but I'm now cheered up a bit as for once his are too small! Still, at £2 not bad.
We ate in an extremely un-atmospheric waterfront cafe (industrial kitchen & washing hoses crashing away beside us, but very fast service): fresh clams with black-bean sauce, prawns with chili, gorgeous fish in ginger (you remove the flesh yourself but aren't allowed to turn the fish over/ remove its head as that means the boat that caught it will sink), bok choi (nice green veg) and octopus,

Octopus Lantau cafe
Originally uploaded by wildcatfin.

an entire tureen of soup that was basically stock waiting for flour & bisto to be added to make gravy. I now realise the reason Pete hates shrimp is he was never shown the easy way to peel them, so he's converted now he's nearly got the hang of it! Slight misunderstanding on the rice & noodle front (ie we didn't get given any) but to tell the truth I am fed up of boiled white rice so we decided we'd go look elsewhere for my carb intake.


It was dark when we arrived back in HK harbour, and the light shows a lot of the big office blocks on both side of the water put on every night had begun. Hoardes of people, police, first aid stands etc had already arrived even though it was only just after 7 pm & the China Day stuff wasn't on till 9 pm. We ended up getting a taxi to the main Royal Hong Kong Yacht Club centre on Kellet Island, (as a lot of roads/ buses were stopped & cancelled to help with the eevent) which is incredibly posh! It used to be a proper island but Hong Kong sort of engulfed it so now its a tiny wee promentary with its own marina. After the nice security man let us skip the signing-in queue (& didn't charge Pete for my ticket as he recognised him as staff) I got given a short tour of some bits of the building - as we were windswept & in boardies & Tshirts we didn't quite fit! But they have a pool, gym, assorted restauraunts, kids areas, a HUGE dvd library,......great! We got drink as the main bar where Pete got accosted by the MD who's convinced Petes from Portsmouth & I'm his girlfriend. (Their marguritas were minute & and fairly awful compared to Janets, don't tell Pete but I poured most of it away!). We then spotted all the people sitting out on the breakwaters which project out into the channel from around the marina, so we worked our way round there. Lots of the locals had huge tripods & cameras set up on the flat tops, so we slid down the steep sides & perched on the massive blocks making up the walls. And waited. Police cutters & fire boats cordoned off the far east side of the channel first, and chased all the boats out to the west, then blocked that too. Even though we'd worried about getting stuck on Lantau (as they were stopping all ferries during the show) there was the occasional flurry of action when a ferry DID launch; and they then let a massive crusie ship trough too! I watched the buildings light shows - beautiful neon rainbow ripples, shading through the spectrum; some only have white lights but make it look as if there are things running up them, others project words, patterns, pictures; at one point we confused our neighbours by making Star Wars light sabre sound effects as it looked like two office blocks were fighting with huge spotlights accross the water. Aftr an hour we realised we'd got the time wrong so Pete went for more drinks & I helped lots of people climb down to sit where we were. Then our 'pet' cockroach re-appeared from under one of the rocks & scared away several successive batches of locals, I'm not sure which freaked them more, it running around or me picking it up & chucking it away from them.

Anyway, eventually several massive barges surrounded by more police & fire boats were sailed into the middle of the channel and they started the China Day fireworks with a bang.
It went on for over 30 minutes, and it was THE best display I have ever seen, beat Edinburgh & Germany hands down. Loads of stuff I have never seen before, from ones that made butterfly, heart or star outline shapes, to 'bulls-eyes' of concentric differently coloured circles, ones mimicking the planet Saturn, amazing bubbly ones and others that really made the entire sky sparkle like twinkling sheets of stars (not the sort of golden shimmery rain that used to be my favourite). Also most impressive were red flowered ones like HK's hibiscus flag symbol, and sort of shimmery thick chrysanthamums with further explosions for their stamens.
Lots of the traditional 'ooohs' and 'aaahs' from the Brits, but locals go 'Wahehey' instead. The sound as it was reflected back by all the skyscrapers was mad, and a lot of the buildings got lost in the smoke! I have made an entire album of the pics I took - wierd, but fab! After it ended it took us an hour just to get onto the pavement, only to find a queue several blocks long for our minibus & no taxis in sight. Luckily it was well organised, with about 15 minibuses already waiting for our route. While waiting we bought a gorgeous big round waffle from a stall - they don't cut it into its quarters, but mix peanut butter & evaporated milk, spread that on it and sort of concertina it into a cone shape. Yum! Also finally explaining WHY peanut butter is kept in the pudding section of the supermarket! Please experiment amongst yourselves, was gorgeous. We even made our last ferry home!
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Letter 10 - Tung O Beach & Walk


Thought you might like to see what I do when I'm bored at home! If you want really gross, a woman I talk to a lot on the Pro Face-Painters chatsite specialises in painting actors to train army medics at full-on casualty simulations. The people she paints are called 'Amputees in Action' & their motto is 'we won't cost you an arm and a leg'!!! So she does up their stumps to look fresh & has made nurses faint, cool!

Pete had last weekend off, so I actually went OUT on the island (plus it was a bit cooler) and we walked south about 30 mins, through a sweet little 'village' (no flats & beautiful gardens full of gladioli etc in naturalisic settings) and several hills/ valleys.
The bamboo forest is nothing like the amazing ones in the Crouching Tiger/ Flying Dagger films, here they are dusty, dark and full of giant mozzies! Lots of banana, ginger (?) and some sort of yam type root (casava?) in the damper valley bits. Also quite a few burials, those little gatherings of big urns in a semi-circular walled space; and some derelict houses I want to loook at when the mozzies have gone - its just so unsual to see single storey buildings & they seemed to have remnants of decorative moulded plaster around the doors. We stopped at Tung O beach which was gorgoous, no rubbish (though pete says you couldn't see the sand for it after the last typhoon), far cleaner, deeper, bigger and nicer than our beach! Warm to swim in too though a bit scary as it shelves off rapidly, the water is too murky to see far, and it has no shark nets. I put pics in my Flikr album - join and contact me so I can list you as family/ friend if you want to see them or the African ones (only but up a few of the - 500!!!- from Kenya). Pete decided we would go a different way back, promising it was about 20 minutes longer. 2 HOURS of exertion later I was in tears as we were still above the same Tung O bay!!!! It was a zig-zag path up the side of assorted ridges, down again, up the next - and I hadn't had lunch/ any food/ sweets with me as Pete had said we were just nipping out for 30 mins for a swim! So basically I had a hideous hypo for most of the time & kept trying to be sick - turns out when he climbed it before he was drunk (the same day he went to the top of the tallest mountain, and got stuck on a rock in the dark overnight) so had no memory of most of the route. I'm glad I didn't pass out as the ants were massive. And I doubt Pete could carry me. Still I expect if I do it again with food in me and NOT on a blazing hot flat calm humid day, the views will be great. I've lost any climbing muscles I got from teaching on steep hills in Dorset long ago - I'm definitely not up to cousin Lochies climbing Kilimanjaro standard!

I went to collect my work visa from the mighty Immigration Tower on Monday - as expected - daft! Queued, had to hand in letter they sent; wait in rows of seats. Waited extra 30 mins as I didn't recognise a single syllable of my name which they had been calling; queue to pay for it, sit and wait to receive it. Arguement as I hadn't put my middle name in on something random & it was only in my passport & not on my other ID, and as far as they are concerned thats my whole given name - HOW long is it if I write that and double barrell it too??? Again missed my name even though i was listening harder! Collected it.....now I have to do a trip to Macau (closest & easiest way to leave the country briefly) to cancel my tourist visa & start the dependancy visa. Then I can queue to make an appointment to get my fingerprints etc done for the HK smart ID card we have to have; then the same rigmarole collecting it I expect!


FINALLY found a shop selling postcards (in Central) so actually now have some to write. I ended up spending a (relative) fortune on the handmade local crafted cards they hid at the back though - everyone wants the tacky Hallmark type cards instead, whereas what I got were individually hand painted, embroidered (machined those tho) and AMAZING cut paper pictures that were then hand tinted.

Afterwards I had ages to wait until I could meet Pete after work, so I went to the cinema in the posh mall where we had the posh MacDonalds. Posh staff - the minute you stop to look at one of their big maps, people dressed as bank managers mob you to ask if they can help! (Crap directions from the cinema lady so thank goodness they were there, I hadn't even worked out which wing/ floor I was on!). Posh seats! Big huge sinky leathery things, nice. The talking throughout the film wasn't as bad as I'd been told, but for mid-afternoon on a Wednesday it was packed! No spare seats. Really unimpressed as when I left & was making my way to the bus station through the shiney marble palaces pretending to be malls & offices, I said no thanks (in Cantonese!) to one of those leaflet chuggers and then went flying in a puddle on the marble floor. At which point he warned me it was slippy. Thanks. There are LOADS of those leaflet touts, with wheely granny-shopping-trolly-bags full of literature, or people in suits with pop-up banners & tables trying to get you to join their bank/ phone company/ insurance by offering posh looking watches etc if you sign up! The other thing is I now spot around there is the recycling people, who I think may be homeless, making money by sorting/ collecting out of all the bins: as they actually have a flat sack trolley like in DIY merchants, and go round all the streets/ shops back doors collecting their speciality. It's usually the cardboard ones I spot, as they end up looking like mobile versions of that wierd garbage living puppet form 'The Labryinth - you just get towering piles of flattened boxes careening up the pavement towards you seemingly of their own accord.

New silly shop names spotted - Win Key opticians; Fat But (no idea, was closed), Fresh Pets (think they meant their ideas/ gear & were not encouraging eating fluffy pekinnese types); Spankeys (posh suits). Oh yes and a 'Goo Fish' bakery - related? to its bread flavours? - i hope not!

I have had a bit of luck - went to an interview last Tues (in Starbucks) to meet the organiser of Hong Kongs only rock festival, Rokit. Headlined by Goldy & the guy from the STone Roses this year, alongside some wierd (I mean really odd) Chinese star and about 30 local bands. They have one backer, no government/ sponsorship help (odd!) and a minimum of 5000 tickets sold each year. Sadly she can't hire me for the day outright as they have no budget, but I don't have to pay for a pitch & she's providing a stall for the day, as well as handing out my card to all her clients. I can charge per face, thing is some stuff is SO cheap out here that if I stick to my old £2-£3 per face I will probably get NO takers! That's if there are any anyway! Ah well, is all PR. Also had a few enquiries about me painting at kids parties, both from the ultra rich Peak area of HK where all the dentists & diplomats live: furious to find that yet again 1 of them (on the expat classified ads website) wants someone far cheaper but still as good as me (won't happen!) and now has some idiots telling her to use acrylics & do it herself! Emailed her again warning her, as thats a HUGE mistake, big court cases with kids who had that done & the sun actually made the acrylic paint cause 3rd degree burns in the shape of the hearts etc painted on their cheeks, poor souls. Extra annoyed as she is paying triple what I asked her already for a magician, but once again face painting is seen as 'mummys hobby', grrr. We are talking about getting a union going in the UK for exactly that reason, we are at the bottom of the entertainers scale because we don't have a "Magic Circle' to insist on basic skills & charges!

My second meeting was with a funky pair of Latin American ladies who run Maya Consultations, organising product launches, big posh parties, corporate dinners etc. They want me to start by painting 4 models they have hired to launch 4 new flavours of Patron Tequila at a big bash. I've never heard of it but apparantly its the bees knees, outsells all others 4 times over in the USA. Anyway, they have hired a young local designer to make dresses for them, then I do their faces/ arms, not entirely sure what in/ as - all 4 'flavours' are bright colours, funky cut crystal bottles are engraved with a beeautiful styalised bee so I'm working around that.

Still chickening out of the dried food stalls - ok, the flattened opened up squid I now see, a few of the seeds/ beans i think I know - but huge drifts of unidentifiable other stuff. Umm, mushrooms? Dried plants? Shrivelled caterpillars? Afore-mentioned veterinary operation by-products? I have NO idea. The fresh/ dried meats stalls are the same though I can usually tell what most is (using a process of deduction/ addition from a bit I recognise to build up/ dissect the whole animals in my mind). They sew up the chickens/ ducks in an odd sort of shoe-laced-tightly- pattern before they are cooked, then hang them in rows. Most cooked meat is bright red or saffron yellow according to whatever they have done to it. The slabs where they chop off what you want/ slice what you want are right on the pavement, bit scary watching their huge cleavers whacking down right in front of watching toddlers. Talking of which - veggies close your eyes - I opened up whatever it was Pete bought home for tea last night to find what I'm pretty sure was cooked sliced intestine. Cut in rings, smooth muscle on the inside, sort of wrinkly outer layer. Tasted Ok (sorry veggies but I was hungry & we had no other food/ ferries). How he can muck up ordering at that place, where all you do is point, I don't know! I actually prefer the veggie 'meat', its lovely , big range of texture/ flavour from 'oysters' to 'pork', but as I said, I was fooled & confused at first when we went to them! Didn't correctly identify lunch at the bakers today and got a surprise - cheese roll - (I thought) turned out to be a sweet roll sprinkled with yellow coconut & filled with salty fake cream. Hmm.

Petes buzzing as he found someone to buy a windsurf board from and has been leaving at 5 am for the early ferry, to take the bus PAST his work stop to get a few hours windsurfing at Stanley. Originally they refused to let him surf there, as despite being the ONLY RYA (gods of all sailors I think) qualified windsurf senior instructor in HK as far as we know, they wouldn't recognise his certificates! For some reason they have changed their minds so he's now allowed to rent sails from them & go out to wreck himself in the typhoon winds. Some gusts have been mad, and red warnings forced him to cancel nearly all his sailing courses at work, but him & the other nutters are out windsurfing in it! He's now trying to brainwash all the club members/ staff he meets into wanting to be windsurfers so he can get the RHKYC he works for to buy decent kit & let him teach it. He's also 'trying out' a faster board belonging to some guy who just broke his arm on it, so thats where we're travelling on his day off! if he likes it theres one for sale in Bristol & mums arriving from there in a month..........oh dear.


Still having 'discussions' occasionally about the flat - I'd like to look at the newly built ones being finished accross the street, with lovely QUIET working ACs and a proper kitchen & bathroom...but Pete can't see why! He has nice hot proper showers & meals at work so never uses ours and only goes into the fridge for water! Plus its roof terrace is NOT viewed on all sides by neighbours, and has shelter/ shade - STILL not even seen ours which is what Pete got this place for really. Sounds like I won't get off the island, and apart from the ferry/ spider steps it is OK I suppose, and handier for HK/ his work than anywhere else we could afford without a 2 hour journey. I'll keep trying though! I had my first real 'hot' 'shower" (I did scald myself a few weeks back having a shower midday, as the water pipes all have to run over the rocky ground so even the cold water boils) by actually turning on our little boiler, so it must be getting cooler! The humidity is down to 70% which is a huge releif too.
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9th Letter - Books, Boats & Make-up

Well I finished my 2 week cantonese course, but I think I need to repeat it again at home as I know the words (keep popping into my head at odd times), but although I could answer the teacher in class in full sentences, they desert me in real 'life'. Plus locals speak SO FAST and if they reply to my cantonese in a direction I don't know are haven't anticipated, I'm flummoxed! So will work on that to impress all you who will be visiting....by maybe managing to say hello & thank you! Two of my class chickened out of turning up for the test on the final day, honestly, not like they would fail you - we PAID for it! I did OK but it was all 'turn this into english' and I'm far better translating it into english. The rest of the class are staying on for Beginners part 2, but I think if I do another course it will be in a while - that took up so much time (and was pricey!). One of my classmates told me where there is a good language library so I may try that.


I joined the library! Yay! So I'm back to reading 12 books a week which shows how busy I'm NOT. Sadly they are all hardbacks, I didn't see any english paperbacks, and there is a very random selection. They seem to have every Mills & Boon ever written, a lot of University or higher degree level factual books, and then best-sellers and unheard of fiction. So I'm reading stuff about Egyptian history, dracula, science fiction (never bothered with that author before but they have 30 of his books) and odd stuff that looks less boring and less heavy to carry home up that hill! Not the romance, though - I tried them when I was about 14 and decided I could write them better anyway at that age! The huge central star-trek style main library had sofas and chairs everywhere with 100s of people sta reading in them - much more welcoming than in the UK.


Makeup is odd in one way here - most of the products advertised or displayed are to make you WHITER. Talk about the grass being greener - in the UK most of its meant to make you look sun-kissed, and here where a glowing tan is easy to get for real (unless you hide inside like me during this humidity) , its a sign of not being posh I think. I have heard a few comments about prices being layered by the colour of your skin/ origin - 1 for local chinese, next level is Europeans etc, next is darker asian countries. Another wierd thing is that so many of the products are again very familiar - but made more locally, so they have chinese pictograms instead of romanised letters but on the same packaging & background. Oddest of all is they have entire shelves of stuff from Boots, with the same shelf labels just, again, illegible to me. Slightly worried - keep meaning to buy more shampoo so have been glancing in passing, and I swear the stall I passed today had 'placental shampoo' on its bottles!

Jake replied that it is the shame of having a criminal in your family that stops most petty crime, but I have been hearing about the organised crime through Peter, from his local colleagues. Is it Tongs they call the big gangster families?? Anyway there is a big scandal this year as some bloke who was the bouncer on the door of a local club (don't know if he was ex-pat or local) was really rude to a woman who wanted to come in. I think he said she was ugly etc are refusing to let her & her party in. Anyway, turned out she was the girlfriend of someone high-up in the local Tong, and he was furious when she told him. So his 'mean' went back that night and totally sliced up the bouncer at the club with big knives. They later discovered there had been a change of shift, and the rude bouncer had finished work and gone home, so it was an innocent bloke they diced. So, when the poor guy wakes up, he's in a first class private room with all his medical bills paid and some very nice flowers!!!! It's all a bit Terry Pratchett (if anyone reads Discworld) - crime with a conscience! No idea what happened to the original target though!

That all makes me a bit wary of looking too hard at some of the interesting tattoos on blokes here, though! No idea if they are more common on gang members or not, but I won't risk staring / admiring food ones like I did in the UK!


Chandeleirs must be very desireable - there are SO MANY shops & stalls selling them, from fairly modest lamps to huge dangling affairs bigger than our entire kitchen! Still, some of them almost tempt me - sparkly, glittery, ooooooooooooo!!!! Bling is VERY much the thing, on hats, clothes, shoes, accessories (including phone dangles) - you name it, if it can, it WILL be sparkling - Ali G would love it! Even the bathroom tile district is mainly massively garish displays of shower stalls coated in gold and cut-glass effect wall tiles! Although the black marble floors with rainbow sparkle chips in them are quite fetching....

Petes boat has been removed! Efficient harbour police! As we predicted, typical - after he finally found somewhere to store it! So he's now dribbling at build-your-own-live aboard-catamaran kits on the web. We could just about afford the kit if we used all our savings, but the manpower, labour, stuff to stick it all together with, as well as the costs of having a massive dry space to build it in rented for several years, are not do-able yet. (Phew I think!). I think he is also coming round to the idea of us maybe moving, especially as I keep having tantrums about ants/ the loo. What is it with blokes - he makes 2 sandwhiches and uses both chopping boards, both plates (not that he eats off a plate) and most of the utensils, leaving crumbs over the 'work-top' (way too low for us) and the top of the fridge (our height of work-top) - and don't get me started on the bathroom! Plus I am pretty sure all the mosquitos that get us at night are coming up the floor drains in the kitchen/ loo as there is no other way for them to get in. He probably will not move off the island, as the size of the flat here is HUGE compared to what we could afford on Hong Kong Island, and it IS quiet and less polluted, i suppose.and apparantly anywhere else he would consider living is at least a 2 hour commute for him, so thats out the window. But maybe we can go to a place I'm not embarressed for guests to go into the bathroom/ kitchen - and as for the raved about roof terrace he has - I have been here nearly a month and I haven't even set foot on it yet!!!!. So hoping I can get a look at the 'nice' flats (above the ice cream shop & accross from the bakers - wow, food we don't have to import to the island - people - SHOPS!!!!!) in the main village on the other coast of Lamma. Bet he just lets me buy a microwave instead in the hope that actually being able to cook stuff that ISN'T toast or pot noodles will cheer me up about this flat.


My visa has been approved in super-quick time - Petes took a few months, and as we had to fax over a bunch of stuff just over 2 weeks ago that he forgot to include when he applied for mine, I was expecting at least a month's wait - but its ready! Collecting it is another thing though - apparantly will be lots of fun joining different queues on different floors of the dreaded immigration tower. Then I have to take a trip 'out' of the country (accross the water to Macau) which cancels my tourist visa & somehow 'starts' my dependents residence visa. AND after that at some point I also have to go back to the tower & make an appointment to get all my details & stats (I know I get fingerprinted but are they up to retinal scans yet or is that just in Tom Cruise movies?) taken for my smart ID card. (Not sure what it does apart from being another library card & meaning I don't have to carry me passport around). So I am nearly official!

I must register my business here soon - I expect they are stricter than the UK in tracking down people who aren't doing it properly! What is annoying is not being able to source all the bits I need that I couldn't fit in my suitcase - like the big tall folding directors chair that means I don't need to bend when painting whoever is sat in it. All the UK suppliers said 'oh its from China/ Hong Kong', but can I find them here?? Or anyone who will let me import less than 100 at a time form China? There is even someone on UK ebay selling them dirt cheap - one at a time - from Hong Kong!!!!! Urrgh. I can't read HK ebay as there is no translation button, which is odd. SO I am getting Pete to print off pics of what I want at work in the hope a lot of pointing at them will eventually let me find a local stall who knows what I'm on about!

Also business cards are THE thing you must have here, handed out like confetti, but again even though all the guide books & everyone goes on about all the places that do them, I have yet to find them! At the moment I have been handwriting my HK mobile number onto the vistaprint ones I had done before I left the UK. Still, the one really pricey place I found here online does business cards which can even have raised glossy bits or shiny foil or be cut in funky shapes - oooohhh... if I can work out how to submit what I want as an Adobe file, which is a programme I have never used! (Going to be getting a lot of emails from me, Jake/ gee). I have got 3 weeks before my 1st booking to get all sorted.
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Letter 8 - Do My Feet Look Big In This??? - Shoes

Our big news; at the end of that last typhoon, we were saying hi to a guy in the bar on our beach as we walked home from the ferry, when there was a massive rumble. Pete & co looked up to see if it was another big storm, but I was looking at my feet and the accross at the old quarry (you can see it on Google Earth's view of Lamma) as I was sure it was from below. It wasn't until we climber up to the top we found a guy Pete had met being chattered at by locals - the radio said it WAS an earthquake! There was another later, just grumbling rattles again. The next day, the english teacher guy who is in my cantonese class said it happened when he was 26 floors up, teaching, where all the rooms are glass walled from chest height up. They all stopped & stared at each other accross the whole floor; and after their classes finished their boss told them to all get under their desks the second it happened again, as with all that glass it could have been a blood bath! Not entirely sure why it happened, will have to do a websearch, as they are not meant to BE here!


School bags here I find really quite depressing - most toddlers are OK, they get their school kit carried by their mum/ maid. Its really sweet watching them on the ferry, as just before we get into Aberdeen they all get their outfits changed even if they are spotless, and have clean white socks & different school shoes put on. But the 7-12 year olds - the bags are bigger than they are! It's scarey! They are about the size of my small roller suitcase, like an air-stewerdess's bag, and some of the kids are lucky enough to have ones they CAN pull along rather than carry. And the uniforms are SO unfair! The worst is the poor girls in the spotless white pleated knee length skirts & tops - and the poor lads going to that same (Catholic?) school, all in white - what an awful colour to keep clean! To make things worse there is a really sadistic school clothes designer somewhere - all the sweet boat-collared white shirts the girls wear, with their little ribbon ties at the neck- they button up the BACK so there is no way you could put it on yourself as far as I can see. Unless you are a contortionist. Or maybe they do up the bottom buttons with it on backwards, twist it round & walk to school until a friend can do the top ones???? Most pupils have similar to what the UK used to have (before the waves of uniform polo shirts & sweaters took over), except the girls are often in tartan skirts, some look very school disco/ Manga cartoon-ish. The fashion for girls shoes is massive black leather Mary Janes with the strap across the middle and rounded toes, so they look a bit like clowns with HUGE feet on them. The canadian teacher & I aggree the ugliest uniform is the chinese style cheongsam (those dresses usually in silk that fasten at the neck diagonally), as in cheap thin blue school shirt materal, with straight sides, its hideous & uncomfortable as soon as the girls aren't like sticks any more.

It seems theres a big lack of arts in schools, nearly all on offer is extra-curricular. And for a city there seems to be not much public artsy culture - I have seen 1 poster for Figaro by a touring foreign opera, and 1 poster (oh dear!) for a West-Life concert - I mean, London is HEAVING with plays etc. Saying that there does look to be lots of arts festivals, hope we can go to/ do some of them. There are LOADS of arty shops/ cafes/ clubs in the city where you pay astronomical amounts to paint, do pottery, jewellery etc. I quite fancy joining the YWCA as they have a great selection, from traditional chinese knotting to Indian cookery and walking trips. You can even get escorted by a local to the jade or pearl markets, get help to barter for what you want, then get taught how to make your own real pearl necklace. Etc! There are also a lot of courses 'for your helper' to 'teach her how to prepare & present a traditional english/ indian/ french dinner'. ... and so on! But Pete refuses to pay for them, wants me to find free ones - don't exist! So I think if I do get work I wont be contributing to his boat building fund it will be for stuff like that!


We have another contender for 'silliest names' - up till now the girl called Sky I had at Field Studies camp 2 years running wins (she was Sky Blue Mercedes in full as thats what her dad REALLY wanted). But - the Canadian teacher has 2 (unrelated) boys in his class, one named 'Human' and the other 'Alien', for their christian names! As for shops, I have giggled quite a bit - from passing Wan King Supplies, Wan Co Underwear, etc - I forget most of them, sadly!

I have taken a few pics (only from the bus) of the local cematries, but I will go for a closer look at St Micheals Cematry, definitely. From afar there seems to be no greenery whatsoever, all concrete; and a more 'christian' side, with crosses, angels etc; on the chinese side they all have little photos of the deceased on the stones/ cremation boxes, not entirely sure how that works. The truly oriental graves (the wealthier version of the occasional pots backed by a curving wall burial we sometimes spot on our island) seem to be almost like little amphitheatres focusing on the burial pot or tomb door. I'm planning a visit not just because I'm morbid, but also as I'm looking for a distant relation. Granny Fin had a cousin who was sent out here as a young catholic priest, after the war, I think. He stayed here for the rest of his life, setting up welfare places, teaching and doing all sorts for the commnunity. His letters were really interesting, especially about a typhoon that blew the windows & their FRAMES into all the buildings as well as wiping out most of the fishermen. He didn't really say how important his work was, but the letters sent to her & another cousin (who trained asa nun alongside a young Mother Teresa!) mention all the work he did setting up hostels etc, and how packed his funeral was. Anyway, my bus to 'school' every day goes over a fly-over, past his site in Happy Valley, so I will go and look when I work out how to get down there.


Ooh, that reminds me, flowers - if there is an occasion, they send HUGE bouquets which are displayed on shoulder high tripods a bit like in a church! Very hazardous as they take up most of the pavement and sort of explode sprays of leaves everywhere from a central arrangement of huge flowers, decorative cabbages and fruit. I passed a restaurant with them all lined up outside it, and as one said 'congratulations from the Browns' on the red & gold wide ribbon they mark their comments on, I could actually read it. No idea what the congrats were for - new management? Baby? Tax relief? There are also quite a lot of florists, it seems to be the thing to give big bunches of tiny rosebuds to people too. I want to buy the really cool pitcher plants some of the sell, hope they eat mosquitos too! Some have those weeping fig trees I had as house plants but AMAZING - Pete got me the lovely one with the plaited trunk for a birthday a few years back, but some of the business's here have them with really intricate stems woven into sort of tube that sprouts into trees at the top. A lot of places, and taxis & boats, also have to have a little bundle of leaves etc on/ by their alters. The boats hang it off their prow bit, with ribbons & incense. Theres one poor old guy who often gets on the ferriy with me, carrying a bunch of leaves (often sorts through the bin on the trip, collecting plastic bags), and I wonder if that is what his palm leaves etc get sold / used for. We even saw a street stall doing very good business for tiny wee plant charms to dangle on their mobiles (they love the little charms/ toys/ jewellery things that hang off the phones -mine doesn't seem to have an attachment for dangles or I'd be tempted too, to Petes horror!). They were clear plastic boxes, smaller than 1 cm, each with a tiny bud of a succulant, air plant or cactus growing inside! The other common gift is a hideously decorated basket, like those ones babies come in on storks, decorated with net frills and with huge ribbons on the handle. They get stuffed with fruit mainly (the fruit stalls hang them around their ceilings for you to choose), covered with cellophane & more ribbons, then lugged off.

More cool bugs - still not had my good camera on me the few times when I have spotted a preying mantis type thing, but they are getting fed up of me poking them so they look my way. Sadly my wee snappy camera can't focus on small things. Theres also a stupid orb spider which tries to build its web accross the causeway from the ferry passenger shelter to the railing. The first night I walked through it going pfffffttttt as I got web all over me, and Peter came rushing up to see if I was OK, as he'd seen the annoyed spider charge out after me. Luckily I HADN'T!!!! But sadly the last 3 nights I have, though it's of the body type/ species which doesn't worry me as much as the big leggy ones. Still I don't want the orb spider too close - it's body is at least the size of a decent plum! I was wondering what they actually eat, gnats won't satisfy theses guys, and Pete saw one munching a thumb sized shield bug... and dribbling, apparently it was very juicy. Yum. Still not managed any butterfly pics, they fly REALLY fast, even the big 'bird winged' ones; shame a lot are boringly similar to our UK ones!
Still, we did get a good look at a sort of ichneuman waspy thing that nearly hit us as it was lugging along a caterpillar the length of my finger. It crashed, and Pete was disappointed as it then decided to run & carry the thing with it. I'm not sure if it was just food, or one of the paralysed ones that get an egg layed in them so the grub when it hatches has live, fresh food to eat before pupating inside the caterpillars remains! On a prettier note, the dragonflies (boring yellow/ brown) don't seem as terratorial as UK ones (yes I know the UK ones sometimes gather if theres an ants nest flying out etc but not this often!). There are CLOUDS of them everywhere on our island, at least 30 in a bunch. I was watching the shadows waiting for the ferry yesterday, and they are so fast/ many it made it look like a sort of rippling heat haze on the concrete.


Police stations all have murals outside them done by local kids with phrases such as "NO BULLY!" and other like-minded things featured on them. Pete was saying how little crime there seems to be, whether due to the social stigma of having it in your family or the actual punishments I will find out! So often we see shopping waiting to be collected just left on the pavement, even in deserted bits of the city, or huge deliveries left piled on roadsides. I dropped my purse getting off the mini bus and nearly got deafened, by about 30 people in the queue getting on it, who were chasing me screaming 'Missy' at me! I only really see police on traffic duty, and something was going down on Friday in Wan Chai as there were groups of them all over the place, even the locals looked edgy.

Pete's boat is still here - after sinking when he tried to re-float it, and managing to float itself the day he handed in all the paperwork to get the Harbour Police to drag it away, it has worked its way slowly down our beach. With the help of the cafe owner Pete tethered it in the middle of the beach, then the owner said Pete could store it on a bit of his land if he wanted. Typical as thats what Pete had wanted to do but been told no originally! So we dragged it up over the path just before the last typhoon, just as well as the torrents draining down to the beach cut a massive sort of river gully where the boat used to be, over a metre deep & 3 times as wide! Anyway after seeing how well I did NOT do (apparantly him saying 'its all in your head' is meant to stop me being seasick/ terrified) on the ferry in rough weather, Pete has calmed down on his plans to build a round the world catamaran for us. Yay! Though I prefer that idea to the rowing-pwered recumbant bike (there is even a website for the idiots that have built those that can FLY as well) or the pedal powered Hawaiian canoe he has also researched. We did trek up to the north of the city to look at tandem recumbant bikes (my wrist won't last even a few hours on normal upright bikes, we tried in the UK) to meet what I can only describe as a 'character'. An english bike shop owner, ex-pat for way too long, completely obsessed with bikes, swearing, smoking and accidentally insulting women incessently, more or less in that order. Still, if we want to spend at least £3,000 on a tandem recumbant bike that has a trailer that converts into 2 suitcases (that the bike also folds into) for transport when not being ridden, he's our man. Sadly the nighbours/ ex-pat community are getting the message that Pete likes old tat and are staring to give him theirs. So we now have the start of one of the above-mentioned projects - Rob the Canadian has donated a 10 year old bike that was used every day for 7 years, and has lived outside in the rain/ heat for the whole time........I reckon a fairly damp sponge would probably poke a hole through the frame.

Shoes have been driving me up the wall - after 5 days of sodden feet in my assorted sandals & flip-flops, (some of which are so fed up of being damp that they are growing mould), I started looking for a cheap-ish pair of something that would actually keep my feet dry or at least keep the dodgier bits in the cold puddles off them. I tried all the shoe stalls along the huge main road my class is on (they ALL sell the same brands) and finally decided a £5 pair of canvas shoes (converse all star rip-offs) would be a start - LOVED the sparkly ones but I went for the classier black sparkled version. Of course, none of them do that above a size 5 as its a 'ladies shoe' and my feet blatantly are not lady-like in this neck of the woods. So I got the boring plain black men's sized ones - even then he had to go to the basement to see if they had any that big! As they didn't go with any of the skirts I generally wear (still too hot for trousers!) I spent the afternoon after class in the shopping district. I tried 19 shops & 11 stalls for shoes, again, mostly selling the same styles - as long as you like court shoes, strappy pointed stilettos, open toes, high heels or wedge sandals you are fine. Unless again you have feet over size 5. In the end I got 2 pairs of sort of flat pumps which SAID they were size 7 1/2 & 8 in Uk sizes, bigger than I normally am, but they are STILL too small, gutted! She gave me a discount as she has had them 2 years...........Of course it hasn't rained as much since.
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